Much like three weeks into the NFL season, the Blitz season has been struck with Parity. What’s parity some may ask. Well Webster’s Dictionary defines Parity in sports as is when participating teams have roughly equivalent levels of talent. In such a league, the “best” team is not significantly better than the “worst” team. This has been the first year in many that this has existed in our league and it’s not a bad thing at all. Even B teams have visions of sugar plum championships floating in their heads.
The first game of the day took place between a surging Illmatic squad and Metrowest Boomin squad coming off their first win of the season. This one was a bit chippy at the beginning but it didn’t prevent Justin Vasquez from chiming in on offense for Illmatic. He caught the game’s first TD while leaping over a defender only to knock him down while waltzing into the endzone. Jordan Martin then kept it going for Illmatic as he caught a post over the middle from the 25 to go up 13 points. Cory White got it done on offense with a safety sack to go up 15. As the half was ending, Metrowest got on the board by way of Lou Monty. He caught a ball in the chest from their own 22 and rumbled and bumbled his way into the endzone to close out the half. The second half was less impressive as both teams combined for just one more score. Tyler Hartt caught a quick slant over the middle then proceeded to shake 4 Boomin defenders for 6. Illmatic wins it in a game riddled with penalties, 22-6.
In the first interleague matchup, the early season favorites in the A’s took on the early season favorites in the B’s as the Blue Balls of Doom took on Young Dynasty. There was a lot of trash talking this week in pressers between these teams and finally the time has come to settle it. The Blue Balls of Doom jumped out to an early 12 point lead in the first half thanks to QB Dave Martel. He marched his team down the field slowly eating clock in 2 of 3 possessions. The first TD pass went to Kiel Canada and then after a pick, Jay Smooth added 6 more for his team. After the break, Young Dynasty adjusted to the Blue Balls offense but were still as successful as they were in the first half. Kiel Canada added another pair of TD’s and pick to earn player of the game honors. Blue Balls of Doom leaves Young Dynasty scoreless in their first big boy game, 24-0.
Going into the season, many experts had 603 Mafia giving the legends of the league, a run for their money. Unfortunately, injuries, matchups and conditions have all changed their hopes for a title run. Teams don’t win games on paper and as good as 603 Mafia looks there, they don’t look as good on the field. The TMoney Tigers took full advantage of the injured riddled mafia gang and their 5 henchmen. After 603 Mafia got on the board first by way of a Marcus Villafane “kid flash” rushing TD, the Tigers scored 21 points unanswered to the close the game out. QB AJ Rotella connected with three different receivers for three different touchdowns as he spread the ball all around. The defending fall champs remain undefeated early in the season, 21-7.
What looked like the Blitz game of the week, didn’t end of actually being it. The Punishers and the Vikings squared off at 9:30 and it was a coming out party for the Punishers. Dane Shindler earned player of the WEEK honors with his standout fantasy performance. Aside from casually tossing 5 touchdowns passes on the day, he picked off 3 Vikings passes, one of which he took to the house for 6. For the losers, Kevin Langevin kept his red hot touchdown streak alive, hauling in 2 more for the second straight week. Despite the Vikings best effort, they had no answer for the Punishers loaded and deep roster. The Punishers like the Tigers, remain undefeated 39-24.
The most exciting B game of the day took place at 10 when the quasi B, Knocks took on the Ultimate Warriors. Larry D’irroco got the scoring started in this one. Not many would picture D’irrico as a ballerina but he did his best impression of one with his TD catch. D’irrico outstretched a defender for a ball and was tiptoed his way down the sideline spinning and shaking to avoid flag pullers to give the Ultimate Warriors an early lead. The Knocks would quickly respond. Kyle Milkenvich caught a beautifully placed TD in the back of the endzone for the equalizer. The game would be tied at 7’s for the brunt of the next 40 game time minutes. Milkenvich then took over the Knocks. He caught 3 of his 7 receptions in their final drive along with another leaping endzone grab to finish the day. The Knocks have earned their first Blitz victory over a solid Ultimate Warriors team, 13-7.
At 10:45 we saw what we thought was going to be a preview of B championship game, instead what we saw was a beat down of an overly confident Championship deadbeat. Flagnado who have yet to allow a point in their 2 games thus far matched up against the Goonies. The Goonies changed that narrative instantly on their first drive. Derek Chouinard caught the game’s first TD on the third play of the game as the Goonies marched out in front early. On Flagnado’s first drive, a JJ Watt like rush from Ryan Allen of the Goonies led to a second snap interception by Chouinard to set up a Craig Maynard TD. This trend continued as Flagnado had no answer for Maynard and QB Steve Tamouris. The two connected on 6 receptions, 3 of which went for 50+ yard TD’s. Flagnado had no answer on offense or defense as the Goonies roll, 43-14.
The BLITZ GAME OF THE WEEK came at 11am as the Rage and Scoregasms took it to the wire. The Rage came out slinging. QB Jimmy Sanford found Christian Reyes for his first career TD to take a quick lead. Shortly after that, a mouse in the house danced his way into the endzone to give the Rage a commanding 13 point lead. The Scoregasms would eventually be able to sneak some points in before the break by way of a Dan Walkley TD to pull within 6. After a breathtaking halftime performance by local pop legend Muno Bars, the game got exciting. Scott Danuliek caught a TD to tie it up for the Scoregasms. Reyes would then add his second TD of the game to put the Rage up 7 once again. Then finally in the closing minutes of the game, the Scoregasms welcomed back Leon Lackiram. A member of the original six, Lackiram has been catching Blitz Touchdowns since 2012. Like everyone who’s accomplished everything in their respective league, he walked away and took some time off to find himself and spend more time with his family. Alas, now he is back. Back doing what he’s good at; slicing defenses up and eating their hearts with his bare hands. Lackiram caught a game tying, overtime forcing TD to keep this battle going. After the Rage ate almost the entire clock to have their drive stall at the 15, the Scoregasms took back over. They worked quickly. Quick out here, quick out there, using the sidelines and their timeouts to matriculate down field. Finally the game ended. Lackiram corralled a ball from the sky and tucked it to his chest as he hit the ground. Good night, game over, drive home safely. The Scoregasms upset the Rage in a thriller, 26-20.
The Battletoads and Insanity squared off at noon in a B matchup. Insanity is showing slow signs of progress each week but the Battletoads are not the horse they wanted to run into this week. The Toads have been leaping over their competitors and are poised to hop into the A’s sooner than later. Ben Glassman was the reception leader of the day with 11 snags for 99 yards and a TD. JJ Lopez and Jesse Diaz made impacts for Insanity. Diaz caught Insanity’s first offensive TD of the season and Lopez led his team in receptions and tackles in a losing effort. The Battletoads remain unbeaten and do what they set out to do; put up points with pints, 32-6.
The finale pitted Beast Mode against America’s Children. Like the Battletoads, America’s Children has been rolling as of late and are slowly moving up the ranks into A division respectability. Tom Scalley of Murica kept his momentum moving as a top tier receiver. He secured 7 balls and a pair of TDs as just his scores alone was enough. Andy Lam and Vin Hoang have a nice little rapport going on for Beast Mode but it’s not there quite yet. Jesse Fortier and Ross Pepin were too much for the Children’s defense. Fortier dwarfed his opponents as his size was just too much for the Beast Mode receivers to overcome. Pepin racked up a game-high 6 tackles and stopped the Beast Mode dependent YAC offense. Beast Mode is right there, but they need a little more time to get over the rookie team hump as they fall again, 26-6.